Howdy! Do you have any idea why you're here? If you do then please leave. Otherwise stick around while I spin a yarn about novelty X-RAY SPECS.
During the summer of '76 before your fancy MTV and your Myspace we had comic books. Now a comic book is a series of images with overlaid text that tells a story; usually about homoerotic teams of superheroes. Well these comic books had advertisements for X-RAY SPECS in them, glasses that could let you see through anything. It was seriously amazing. Anyway I sent in my nickel and waited the prerequisite four to six weeks for them to come in the mail. Then BAMN! I had my X-RAY SPECS! However, they didn't work so I sued the company for millions and won, and now I'm using my millions to create FORN CAKES!
So you see, what I'm really trying to say is, I hate you.